I think the cloud is finally lifting. It’s not necessarily that lots of good things are starting to happen, but I’m getting my optimistic bearing back. My perspective is changing. I have to say, this was probably the longest optimism drought I’ve ever had. I’ve gone through lots of tough situations but usually I brood about it for a day or two and then everything is back to normal. This last streak was almost three weeks long mixed with several days on and off in the preceding month. I have a good life. I enjoy it and have much to look forward to. The comments I’ve received here have been immeasurable in their encouragement and help in regaining my perspective. I’m young, I’ll probably make many more mistakes and be in many more worse situations but there’s always hope around the next corner.

Now, onto what I’ve been working on during this mood change. The Mexico donkey story is coming along nicely. After getting about 1,000 words of it down I started having second thoughts about it, wondering if it was too extreme but then Sarah asked me if I was going to quit because the story wasn’t going to work or because I was squeamish. I finally admitted it was because I was squeamish. I think it’s going to turn out to be a good story and I think there are some interesting ideas I can explore with it so I’m going to finish it. We’ll see when I’m done with it whether I think it goes too far. I doubt it.

I’ve also been contemplating Lunchbox Hero. Now that I’m deep into the next book with a new character who is becoming fully developed, I’m happy to see that LBH wasn’t the only good idea I’ll ever have. I went back and reread most of it and I still think it’s a solid book and could land me a literary agent. It also has flaws, most of which I think are fixable but with guidance from someone else. I’ve started thinking about sending it back out into the marketplace and continue trying to land an agent. Is this a bad idea? Should I wait until I have the best book I’ve ever written done and submit that or see what I can land with my first book?